It may sound total weird to some, especially those hyper rationalists. It may be just a fig of my imagination some may call, some may say its an intuition, supernatural, but, it happens, and it has happened quite frequently with unusual precision. I may be working, i may be walking, i may be talking, reading or just dozing, but, all of a sudden, a thought flashes back of the mind, as if, someone reminds me, i speak to myself in exactly these words, “oh.. i have not been to a funeral for many days, of late..” . May be within a couple of days or so, after this thought occurs to me, i get a news of death of someone i know and i have to go to his/her funeral. Eerie, it may sound, but to trash it as an one off incident or just a bad coincidence would be gross injustice, for it has happened to me atleast, seven eight times now. yes, there are many a things beyond our comprehension i may say to ignore the early warning.
It was one such evening, when i was returning from my Office, i was tired and was climbing the staircases on the platform, in all the din of a railway station suddenly, almost out of nowhere, this thought flashed, “Oh.. i have not been to graveyard many a days, of late..”. I tried almost in vain to brush aside that thought and started walking the road to my house. It must be within fifteen minutes of this thought, my cell ranged. Ah, it was my kid, i thought, he must have called me to demand some spicy stuff to eat. But, he spoke in a hushed and anxious tone that day, he said pappa, Iyer Aunty died. The lady resided in my adjacent wing. I called back my son to verify, he persisted, but still i refused to believe his stuff. Half way down to my building, i saw our neighbors rushing towards station, they were four five people together, it confirmed that my son had said. The poor lady died just a couple of days before Diwali. It so happened, that she was preparing for the celebrations and was cleaning her house, she asked her husband, who, was a heart patient to go for the evening walk, so that she could clean. She poured the liquid soap on the flooring, and while cleaning just slipped, her brain got injured and she died. The early warning that i got proved correct… again.
Around two months passed off and it was business as usual, hectic scheduled ensured that i was tied with multiple ropes of responsibilities. Leaving too little time even for myself. It was November 14th and i was working in my office, all of a sudden, again this thought cropped up all of a sudden. I felt that it was a fake alert this time, for i had witnessed death just a couple of months before. I thought this time surely it was fig of my own imagination. And it happened alike. But, this belief lasted for a couple of days. It was on 16th November 2013 at around 12.30 in the noon my brother called me to inform me that my maternal aunt who resided alone at Santacruz passed. It was a bolt from blue all of a sudden. It was shocking, It was painful and it was unexpected. She was a lady who took great care of me, she had no children and when i was a kid, she tended me like her own kid. It was very hard and bad news for me to digest. I had planned to make arrangements for her to so that she could be taken care of well. It all crashed suddenly. I felt cheated by her death. I felt guilty that i could never never repay her debt. We all attended her funeral. It was one of the most saddest day of my life, i can say, after my dad’s death some 18 years ago. It was my stupidity to apply yardstick to death, every time, i would think of my aunt, i would console myself that she was younger than my mom and so had enough years to live. How stupid i was to do so.
That week was spent in gloom, all the rituals were carried out, i could not however console myself, no i did not weep, not a single drop of tear came out of my eyes, but, i was hurt from within. Hurt by the sudden death, hurt by the inhumane behaviour of her close relatives after her death. Her nephew, for example, came the very next day from native place, checked all her belongings, locked the house and took control of her belongings, he or his parents, however, had no time to tend this old lady. The lust for money and insane greed was displayed in the most macabre manner that day. When my aunt was sick some months ago, i did some sos calls to her relatives, one call was to the family of this nephew. I was flatly told on phone that nobody would come to look her.
Somehow, may be my struggled childhood may be responsible for this, but, I have developed an unique method to console myself. After that week when gloom refused to descend, i took refuge to internet, browsed many sites and information about what actually happens after one dies. I suddenly laid my hand on one audio book of world renowned speaker Deepak Chopra, the book titled “Life After Death – Burden of Proof”. Such a magnificent audio book it was, i could relate many a things, that made me curious right from my childhood days. It dealt with the journey of soul after death and the transformations and transitions, it concluded that the physical form was not the end of existence and that the person sans his body remains here and everywhere. It replied to many other questions like past life regression, near death experiences etc. I would recommend it to just everybody and more so to the so called rationalist who drub everything that science is unable to justify as superstition.
After that audio book, somehow, i am not scared of that thought “oh.. i have not been to graveyard for many days, of late..